What Do You Get If...

You cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Yes, as any Beano reader should be able to tell you, a woolly jumper, and that's what I was very chuffed to pick up a rather nice example of the other day in the Salvation Army shop for just a pound. Russet-y orange chenille. The first bad omen came when I washed it and forgot to take the price tag off. Result? Little bits of soggy red cardboard all over the inside of the washing machine. First time of wearing it, and I catch sight of myself in the microwave door: realisation hits that it makes me look like Velma from Scooby Doo (it's got that neck, y'know?). Also, it sheds. I'm leaving more fluff where I sit than the cat does. And then taking it off again: the top underneath, my arms, my hair...all covered in tiny orange flecks. So that was a pound well spent then. Wonder if they'll take it back...